Bereshit 37:3 records that Yaakov loved Yosef more than his other sons because Yosef was a ben zekunim. Why did the Torah need to explain why Yaakov loved Yosef? The answer is that the Torah did not want a person to think that Yaakov loved/ favored Yosef since Yosef was the firstborn son of Rahel. Instead, 37:3 records that Yaakov loved/ favored Yosef since he was a ben zekunim, which literally means a son of Yaakov’s old age.
Can Yosef be considered a ben zekunim more than Yaakov’s other sons? It is true that Yosef was born when Yaakov was 91 (see Ibn Ezra on 37:3), but Yaakov had ten other sons who were born just a little before Yosef. Also, Binyamin, who was born at least six years after Yosef, should have been considered Yaakov's "son of his old age" and not Yosef.
Bereshit Rabbah (84:8, see Rashi on 37:3) quotes Rabbi R. Yehuda who said that the phrase ben zekunim means that Yosef's features were like Yaakov, based on the similarity of the word, zekunim, with the phrase ziv ikunim, which means his features. Yet, is this a reason to love one son more than others?
Ramban (on 37:3) suggests that there was a custom that when a person was old one son was chosen to care for the father, and this was Yosef. According to this idea, the phrase ben zekunim means the son who served his father in his old age. Luzzatto argues that this cannot be correct since 37:2 records that Yosef was a shepherd with his brothers. Sarna (1989, p. 368) writes that from 21:2,7, 24:36 and 44:20, we see that all these explanations cannot be correct since in all the other verses the phrase means a child of one's old age.
Other commentators attempt to explain how Yosef could be considered Yaakov's child of old age. Rashbam (on 37:3) suggests that Yosef was considered Yaakov's son of his old age instead of Binyamin because before Binyamin was born Yaakov had already developed his favoritism to Yosef based on the fact that at that time Yosef was his youngest child. Hizkuni writes that Yosef could not fully love Binyamin since Rahel died when Binyamin was born, so Yaakov loved Yosef more than Binyamin.
My guess is that we must attempt to understand the significance of a child who is born to parents who are old. If a person has a child every year from the time he is twenty until he is 100, would he love the younger children more than the older children? Most likely, no. Or, if a person has no children until he is 70, and then has one child a year for 20 years, would he love the youngest child more than the oldest? Again, most likely, no. If the parent would favor one child it would be the oldest of the twenty children since the person waited for that child for many years while the other children did not involve any unusual anticipation. The significance of the child is not the age of the parent when the child was born, but as to how long the parent waited or longed to have the child. Thus, the idea of a child of one's old age is a child that a person had been anticipating for a long time.
Yosef was the child that Yosef had been waiting for his whole life. When Yosef was born, Yaakov was willing to return home to face Esav, 30:25, even though he did not know anything about his special talents. Instead, he knew that if he died, Yosef would continue the family legacy. Apparently, Yaakov was not sure that his other sons, who were the sons of either Lea of the handmaidens, would be the ones to continue the family heritage. Thus, his anticipation was for Rahel to have a son, and once Yosef was born, then he would not have had any special anticipation for the birth of Binyamin. Thus, only Yosef was the anticipated child, and this is the meaning of the phrase ben zekunim in 37:3.
Sarna, Nahum (1923-2005), 1989, The JPS Torah Commentary: Genesis, Philadelphia: The Jewish Publication Society.
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